Wednesday, November 18, 2009

we know nothing changes too slowly.

it's just weird.. it's weird to think. it's horrid to think how much damage that much vulnerability caused. and how it left me guarded, and it's still here. and i think it will always sort of be here.
and there's the girl crying down the hall, only feet from the stairwell i'm in. and the brokenness of families, that i can't see when i walk into this church building, on these beautiful peoples' faces. and the scars their friends are carrying and keep covered with their sleeves and their wary smiles.
and these only hint at the scars of girls sold into sex, the orphans among dry shrubbery and vultures, the cold rush of murder among tribes of children. and i'm sitting here so far away in my binding stairwell, wondering where the healing is - my heart so hard from being broken and bitter so many times over by my own mind, so jaded with such a long way to go.
knowing healing exists but knowing completely what sobbing a broken existence away feels like.
they say Jesus knows every kind of pain and he can help us through it or save us from us.
i'm pleading that You do that - because You know the magnitude of relief this world requires tonight.
and though all i feel is a lack of hope, i can't expect anything if i never asked.

6 comments:

Josh said...

Wow, soo good. Can I ask where did you get the title from? A song? cause if it is, YYYYYEAAAAAHHHH!!!

Laura said...

Quite possibly, a very wonderful song... ;)

Josh said...

you don't even know. It's my favorite band and one of my all time favorite songs. "I think we were made too pretty"

Laura said...

haha i know..
could the post perhaps be good enough to associate the song with?

Josh said...

yeap. the two combined make it doubly as awesome. haha glad you knew. Absolutely amazing band. sad they broke up.

Laura said...

:)
I wouldn't forget.. &yeah for sure. frustrating and sad.